and had to fire an employee, either
Jack or Jill... He thought he'd fire the employee who came late to
work.
The next morning, both employees came to work very early. So
the manager thought he would fire the first one who took a coffee break.
Unfortunately, neither employee took a coffee break. Then the manager decided
to
see who took the longest lunch break - strangely, neither Jack nor Jill took
a
lunch break that day, they both ate at their desk.
Then the manager
thought he'd wait to see who would leave work the earliest, but both
employees
stayed after closing.
Jill finally went to the coat rack and the manager
went up to her and said, "Jill, I have a terrible problem.
I don't know
whether to lay you or Jack off."
Jill said, "Well, you'd better jack off,
because I'm late for my bus."
back to top
were
sitting naked in a sauna.
Suddenly there was a beeping
sound. The young woman pressed her forearm and the beep
stopped. The others looked at her questioningly. ‘That
was my pager’ she said. I have a microchip under the skin of my arm.
A few minutes later, a phone rang. The second young woman
Lifted her palm to her ear. When she finished, she
explained, ‘That was my mobile phone. I have a microchip
in my hand.’
The older woman felt very low-tech. Not to be out done,
She decided she had to do something just as impressive. She
stepped out of the sauna and went to the bathroom. She
returned with a piece of toilet paper hanging from her rear
end.
The others raided their eyebrows and stared at her. The
older woman finally said………….Well, will you at
that……….I’m getting a fax!!!
back to top
1.
Your
mattress
has
turned
into
a
giant
sponge.
2.
It
takes
five
minutes
to
unknot
your
bodies.
3.
An
earthquake
of
5.4
on
the
Richter
Scale
is
recorded
in
your
area.
4.
The
cat's
exhausted
from
just
watching
you.
5. A
trampoline
company
has
to
come
to
adjust
your
bedsprings.
6.
You've
both
gone
down
one
clothing
size.
7.
You
cancel
your
chiropractic
appointment.
There's
nothing
left
to
adjust.
8.
You
have
to
breathe
into
a
brown
paper
bag.
9.
Boy,
are
you
hungry!
10.
You're
absolutely
satisfied
yet
uncontrollably
horny
at
the
same
time.
back to top
Q:
How
do
you
find
a
blind
man
in a
nudist
colony?
A:
It's
not
hard.
Q:
What's
the
difference
between
a
boyfriend
and
a
lover?
A:
45
lbs.
Q:
What
is
it
when
a
man
talks
dirty?
A:
Daddy
Q:
What's
the
difference
between
a
blonde
and
a
brick?
A:
When
you
lay
a
brick,
it
doesn't
follow
you
around
for
two
weeks
whining.
Q:
What's
the
difference
between
erotic
and
kinky?
A:
Erotic
is
when
you
use
a
feather.
Kinky
is
when
you
use
the
whole
chicken.
Q:
What
is
the
difference
between
medium
and
rare?
A:
Six
inches
is
medium,
eight
inches
is
rare.
Q:
Why
don't
men
fake
orgasm?
A:
Coz
no
man
would
pull
those
faces
on
purpose.
Q:
What's
the
difference
between
purple
and
pink?
A:
The
grip.
back to top
-
"And to think, I was really trying to pick up your friend!"
-
"I thought you had the keys to the handcuffs."
-
"Larry used to do that."
-
"Sorry about that -must be the baked beans."
-
"Keep it down. My mother is a light sleeper,"
-
"Is that it? Can I go now?"
-
"Try not to leave any stains, OK?"
-
"And yet your feet are so big!"
-
"Do you know the ceiling needs painting?"
-
"It's just a rash."
-
"On second thoughts, let's turn off the lights."
-
"Maybe you're just out of practice."
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